Mink Poop

Scenes from Family Christmas Reunion

2012-02-04T17:23:00.001-08:00

Christmas Letter to Our Mouse

2011-12-22T12:39:00.000-08:00

Dear Furry Little Friend:

We have recently learned of your presence in our home. Don’t know if you and your family and friends have been here all year or if you were just visiting, having made your ingress and egress through the small hole the satellite TV installer left when we switched to DirecTV when we finally stopped believing that Dish would add the Mtn to their sports package so we could watch BYU and get Jimmered. But I digress…

Were you here in May when Deanna and Wendell traveled to New York for her graduation from Columbia? How about the few days in July when we went to Kansas City for a family reunion at the Great Wolf Lodge? You might have been startled to hear frequent ringing from Emily’s cell phone. The one she left at home, but thought she may have left behind at stops in Limon, Goodland, Hays, prompting us to stop at Hays, Goodland, Limon and other scenic stops on our way back home.

Just so you know, Emily’s still in Provo, UT, enjoying the social offerings of a college environment slightly more than her part-time job. Ali and Adam are burning through barrels of fossil fuel in the Austin, TX area shuttling children (Clara-12, Emma-10, Hyrum-6, Annie-4) to and from school and church activities. You can follow their doings at Allison Benefield’s Facebook page. Jon and Becky have been busy making improvements to their home in Independence, MO, the evidence of which can be seen on their blog (www.Tolmanitude.blogspot.com), along with Samantha-6, Lucy-4 and Nora-2. You might know Rachel and Ben visit us occasionally from Broomfield, CO, along with Rebecca-14, Spencer-11, and Eva-9. Rachel stopped home-schooling the kids this year and has had time for more frequent blog entries at www.Mys-terry.blogspot.com. They may be relocating after Ben’s graduation from CU in May.

You’ve probably been enjoying our more frequent absences from the house. Wendell had to change his commute from driving to Highlands Ranch to taking public transportation to a downtown office, adding more reading time to his commute. Deanna spends much more time at her medical practice office. If you were a human, you could make an appointment at www.Head2ToeHC.com (but I digress). Our recent invitation to attend Sunday church meetings and weekday social events at the young single adult ward has given you more opportunities to tease Killer (our Chihuahua) and, unfortunately, you took advantage of that situation.

So the week before Thanksgiving, you or one of your colleagues had to take one last bite out of that nylon covered plastic hot water line to the dishwasher. We should have made sure it had a metal covering, but trying to save a few dollars in our tight economy the installer went with nylon. Maybe the nylon is a carcinogen for mice. You guys weren’t such good guests after all. You’d been pooping in the cabinets and under the couch. Anyway, that Sunday morning when we stepped into the kitchen to find a hot water tsunami bubbling from under the sink onto the floor, collapsing the ceiling tiles on the bedroom below, our relationship had to change. Fortunately, for you guys, no one perished in the flood. We shared Thanksgiving dinner at Rachel’s home this year.

It’s too bad you won’t be around to see the new tile floor in the kitchen. The grout should be dry on Wednesday this week. The carpet installers will be here on Tuesday. Let me share a new favorite scripture, Romans 12:19 which reads in part: “Vengeance is mine; I will reap, saith the Lord.” It seems you and your little vermin friends have a fatal weakness for the chunky peanut butter with which we baited the traps.

We were looking forward to having you spend Christmas with us.

Sincerely,
The Big People
Wendell & Deanna Tolman

Columbia Graduation - May 16, 2011

2011-08-18T20:17:00.000-07:00

With a forecast for rain throughout the day on Wednesday, we planned on returning Deanna's graduation robe to the bookstore and assumed we'd find a museum to help us spend a soggy day in New York City.

However, as we emerged from the dark subway at 110th Street station at the Columbia main campus, the sun had peeked out from the dark sky and we made a snap decision. We had come to New York for graduation and Deanna had really earned the right to celebrate. Bubbles donned her robe and turned to the left to find her way to the graduates entrance. The Prince of Darkness turned to the right and meandered his way through the assembled throng to find a position on the quad opposite the podium to witness the proceedings.

Each dean presented the candidates from their disciplines and begged the president to accept them and give them their diplomas. The weather cooperated and began to rain again only after the ceremony concluded.

At the conclusion of the festivities, we walked to the bookstore and returned the rented gown

CUSON Graduation - NYC May 15, 2011

2011-08-16T20:49:00.000-07:00

After a frantic last push to complete papers and projects, Deanna was deemed worthy to be awarded her Doctorate of Nursing Practice. The news was received with great rejoicing and relief.

Family Reunion - Part 2

2011-07-23T14:14:00.001-07:00

More pictures from the reunion....

Girls in swimsuits at the spray park... Hyrum seeming to sprout a leak.

Annie didn't want to get out of the car at the spray park.

The walk to Cabela's was a nice break from the lodge for everyone except the ducks who seemed to regret the intrusion into solitude....

Family Reunion - July 2-4 - Kansas City

2011-07-19T21:46:00.001-07:00

Emily acted quite royally with her pink crown.

Hyrum models a necklace and bracelets crafted from glow sticks.

The grandkids thought it a grand idea to all sleep out in Jon's large tent. Here, they tied all the glowsticks together to form chains. They lasted about an hour in the tent before returning to the house to sleep indoors.

Fireworks on the 4th of July before heading to the Mormon Visitors Center in Independence for the community fireworks display.

Grandkids eating on the balcony at the Great Wolf Lodge.

Dinner preparation in Grandma's room.

Admiring the aquarium at Cabela's.

Getting cool and wet at the spray park at Eisenhower Jr. High in Kansas City, KS.

Lunch at the spray park in the minimal shade...

Annie shows Grandpa which is her sore finger. She is not expressing any emotional detachment or frustration with the events of the day.

New York, New York

2010-06-13T20:14:00.000-07:00

Views from the Empire State Building

Greenwich Village

Awaiting our departure for a sailing ship cruise into the harbor

From the "top of the Rock" Rockefeller Center

Emily pauses for a photo op on the Food on Foot tour in the East Village

Hail to thee, Columbia!

View of Mid-town Manhattan from the East River

St John's Cathedral

Emily flexing her muscles at the Statue of Liberty National Monutment.

Emily getting photogenic, while Deanna pulls out her knitting as we await the arrival of the A train at the 125th Street Station.

Times Square

Scenes from Spring Break

2010-03-23T17:40:00.000-07:00

Annie found a comfortable ride on Grandma's shoulders on her walk through the rainforest at Selvatura Park.

Adam caught a nice fish. The chef at the hotel made a lovely meal out of it.

Exploring on the grounds at the Arenal Kioro Hotel.

Taking a rest stop on the ATV excursion

Christmas 2009 - Year in Review

2009-12-16T18:20:00.000-08:00

Tolman Family Highlights – 2009

Jan 1 – Deanna awakes to the sound of snoring and determines that Wendell is still alive.

Jan 26 – Independence, Missouri – Birth of Nora Deanne Tolman (daughter of Jon & Becky) brings the number of grandchildren to 10, increasing the girls lead over the boys to 8-2, in the bottom of the 9th or so their parents say.

April 19 – 35th wedding anniversary was noted and we can’t remember a darn thing about it. I think there were church meetings.

May – Deanna is accepted into a doctoral program at Columbia University in New York City beginning in August 2009. Wendell’s request to telecommute from New York is denied.
Sister missionaries move out to make room for the Bunker family to inhabit the basement until school ends prior to their move to Kansas, near to, but not in the Leavenworth prison.

June 5-11 – Deanna and Wendell travel to Austin for the baptism of granddaughter Emma Benefield. We spent 10 hours in the sun at Schlitterbahn in New Braunfels to ensure we got sufficient value and sunburn for the investment.

Father’s Day – Adjacent to daughter Rachel’s home in Broomfield is a traffic signal that posts the speed of approaching objects. While on a walk in the neighborhood, son-in-law Ben and grandson Spencer post 10 mph speeds on their Razor scooters. Grandpa Wendell, a long-time Pepsi drinker (for those who think young…) tries to top their mark and hits 13 mph. He attempts to top his own mark, pulls up lame with a sharp pain in right hamstring. The pain dissipates for a time, but reappears several days later along with a slight discoloration.
Emily was the subject of testing at the Salk Institute in San Diego.

Later in June - Jon & Becky visit from Independence, MO. Trips to Tiny Town, the Denver Acquarium. More pictures and commentary can always be seen at ttp://tolmanitude.blogspot.com/
July – Emily is brought back from Provo, kicking and screaming, to have surgery (not related to the Salk visit) and to chaperone her father during the fall when Deanna moves to New York City in August.

August to present – Deanna flies off to NYC to become intimate with the subway system, balancing teaching assignments, term papers, exams and a church calling. Emily volunteers for weekly duty in the Denver Temple cafeteria and teaches father lessons about various virtues – patience, brotherly kindness, etc, etc, etc.

Blogs:

Deanna: http://crazygrandmabubbles.blogspot.com/

Rachel & Ben: http://mys-terry.blogspot.com/
Jon & Becky: http://tolmanitude.blogspot.com/

Ali & Adam: http://4benemonkeys.blogspot.com/

Colorado Indian Summer

2009-10-29T08:12:00.001-07:00

There's nothing like a Colorado Indian summer, those balmy sun-kissed afternoons that make their appearance after the first frost.

I've shoveled three times and SO look forward to winter, if it ever comes....

Timber

2009-10-01T21:53:00.001-07:00

A letter from our HOA kindly asked area residents to consider removing dead or dying trees. We had two very dead cottonwoods flanking a still live tree in the backyard. A bid was solicited to remove all three. The work was completed on September 30. A few pictures and a movie clip are attached.

One of the last evenings with shade....

And I thought I could do THIS???

New view from the patio

Colorado Cares 2009

2009-07-20T18:12:00.001-07:00

On the morning of July 18, armed with shovels, rakes and other implements of destruction, members of the Arapahoe and Aurora Stakes of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints assembled to spread gravel and improve a hiking/running at Quincy Reservoir. The following pictures show, without further commentary, Fox Hollow Ward members in various degrees of involvement and participation. If you would like to suggest captions, please do so in the Comments section.

13 MPH

2009-07-07T14:00:00.000-07:00

On Fathers Day, Deanna and I went to Broomfield to spend the late afternoon and evening with Rachel's family. After dinner, but before dessert, we took a trip around the block to stroll past a real estate asset being considered as their future home. Rachel, Deanna, Becca, Eva and I were on foot. Ben and Spencer transported themselves around on Razor scooters. Shortly after we turned right onto what I believe is West 6th Ave we saw an interactive traffic sign which flashes the speed of approaching vehicles. As no motor vehicles were approaching, the sign detected Spencer drawing near on his Razor at a rate of 10 mph. Ben's long, strong strides pushed his scooter to 11 mph. The challenge dangling in the early summer evening tempted Grandpa to meet or exceed the mark. He took a few deep breaths, shifted his weight into a slight crouch and hurled himself into a sprint. He should have been content with his 13 mph effort. But, no, he was not. He trotted back a few yards on the street to try to improve upon his initial effort. He duplicated the 13 mph, but felt a sharp pain in his right hamstring as he stretched toward the "finish line". He walked a little slower the rest of the way back to Rachel's home and essentially forgot about the incident until about 10 days later... when Grandpa's leg started to hurt and turn blue.

This fine digital photo was taken 10 days after the sprint. I don't think I'll be doing any running for a while. An ultrasound exam on July 2 revealed the presence of a 4 x 4 x 6 (cm) hematoma in the thigh.

We're awaiting the results of a subsequent ultrasound on July 7 to compare with the earlier one as the discoloration had been spreading upward.

Having difficulty sleeping due to pain in the right leg, I took a liberal dose of Nyquil one night last week. I sleep better, but awoke with a cramp on the left side just above my butt. The pain from the left side was worse than the right. Discomfort from both sources are diminishing. I'm going to live...

A work colleague, John French, taking a year-long sabbatical from golf to allow his shoulder to heal, imparted a bit of wisdom:

"Wendell, we're not thirty anymore".

I'm not anticipating being the recipient of a major award....

Austin, June 5-11, 2009

2009-06-20T06:45:00.000-07:00

Grandma and Grandpa Tolman made a trip to Austin to attend Emma Benefield's baptism and spend a few days with Ali and Adam and their family, pictured here outside the Round Rock Stake Center.

Emma with Mom & Dad

Clara the scare bear at Cabela's

Hyrum strikes a more passive pose.

Adam and Annabelle relax.

Grandma and Emma learn how to operate the Bedazzler....

Pizza with cousin Luke.

Annie chugging a juvenile beverage. Not a portent of things to come....

Grandma instructing on the finer points of Burger Shop.

Annie is very proud of herself making sounds on the karaoke machine.

So Cal Adventure

2009-06-18T04:53:00.001-07:00

The Salk Institute called us earlier this year and wanted to have Emily return for testing. Deanna and I agreed that we both had to go along and make somewhat of a vacation of the trip.

Reiko explains a few things about the shrine.

After Reiko explained that she pours small amounts of sake on the gravesite when she visits, Deanna remembered that her dad liked to relax listening to Vin Scully call a Dodger game with a cold beer after a day at work. Reiko just happened to have a cool one on hand and let us take refreshment to share with Roger on our visit to his grave at Rose Hill.

Friday afternoon we drove around Glendale and La Canada getting some pictures of Deanna's childhood homes and school. In the evening we attended a performance at the Glendale Community Theater and had a marvelous time.

On Saturday, we went to Sea World in San Diego... Saturday evening we checked into a San Ysidro motel and looked on the internet for a place to attend Sunday services where we ran into ...

Bishop Jordan Buswell and his family. They invited us to their home to dinner on Sunday evening.

On Monday and Tuesday, while Emily was testing at the Salk Institute, Deanna and I found other things to do. On Monday, we went to the zoo.

On Wednesday, we were back in Los Angeles for testing at Cedars Sinai. Thursday morning before our flight back home, Deanna and I made a quick trip to the Getty Museum. Emily decided to stay at the hotel and rest.

A Mother's Day Ditty

2009-02-05T08:23:00.000-08:00

On Mothers' Day as dinner cooked,
Two grown men, strong and able,
Were asked to stop their gawking
And to please, go set the table.
Jon tossed the plates and glasses
To his father one by one.
Dad placed them on the table
After catching from the son.
But the accuracy was missing
On the first toss of a fork.
Jon's aim was quite deficient
And he left the target short.
Dad bent to pick the errant fork
While Jon the tempo sped.
A second fork fell undeterred
Upon the father's head.
So on this recent Mothers' Day
We thank Mom for love and life.
Glad we started with the forks
And not the sharp new knife.

Christmas Letter 2008

2008-12-23T13:02:00.000-08:00

Despite a growing sense of loss of wit and erudition
Comes now the guilt to keep up with our holiday tradition.
And not dependent for a jolt from steroids or the juice
Creative sparks aren’t flying from our once-resourceful muse.
We sit before the keyboard, with fingers poised to type
And call up news and memories that now seem over-ripe.
We pause here in the present, to conjure up the past
And capture with a few choice words some memories to last.

The Terrys, Ben and Rachel, have moved their 5 man crew
To Broomfield, Colorado while Ben studies at CU.
Becca, Spence and Eva do their chores as children should
And haven’t been caught vandalizing in their neighborhood.

Rachel’s blog: http://mys-terry.blogspot.com/

In a Kansas City suburb, where Jon & Becky dwell,
A lot of half an acre and a home are priced to sell.
Within six weeks, the little house will make room for another.
Lucy and big sister Sam will NOT get a new brother.

Jon’s blog: http://tolmanitude/blogspot.com/

The Benefields in Austin, where the summer sun is hotter
Keep up a very hectic pace with Revolution Water.
And Clara, Emma, Hyrum and little Annabelle
Obey their parents faithfully, but sometimes they raise hell.

Ali’s good-faith effort at blogging: http://4benemonkeys.blogspot.com/

Emily lives in Provo and was working at DI
And learning better how to work and help herself get by.
Her schedule leaves her with free time and not too much to do
To keep her from her on-line buds and friends at BYU

Emily’s e-mail address: ctrnoel@aol.com

Deanna’s life’s been frantic. She leaves a scattered trail
Of loving Christian deeds despite her frequent trips to jail. 1
She thrives despite a schedule that is frightfully forbidding
And helping her throughout it all are books-on-tape and knitting.

During football season, his butt stuck to the couch,
We find guilt-ridden Wendell, that channel-changing slouch,
Making many knitted hats or grumbling, and I quote,
“Honey, where's that needle; have you seen the d#%@ remote?”

Our pathetic attempt at blogging: http://minkpoop.blogspot.com/

Our Christmas wish for you and yours is strength and robust health
And humor and perspective as we view declining wealth.
May your days be full of happiness and free from foul oppression
And may your hard-earned treasure last throughout this “slight” recession.

1 – temporary job doing physical exams at the Denver County Jail.

Memories of Past High Adventure

2008-07-28T06:25:00.000-07:00

BASS FISHING

After three hot days of baking in the scorching Utah sun,
The prospect of a river trip appealed to everyone.
We broke camp at Entrada and headed into town.
A bus would take us way upstream so we could float back down.

Two kayaks and three rubber rafts were pushed out on the water.
Most wanted to get wetter, ‘ere the temperature got hotter.
Each raft had two large buckets. Each raftsman had a paddle.
The paddles were for paddling. The buckets were for battle.
Two rafts were manned by heroes clad in shirts of tasteful gray.
The other by some Oremites, of whom there’s more to say.

In between the rapids, where the rolling waters roared,
We tried to make amusement so we wouldn’t get too bored.
So if an unsuspecting crew was slow at looking back
Their rivals in the other raft would mount a sneak attack.
At a time of inattention, while not picking any fights,
The raft where rode Nick Goddard was assailed by Oremites.

Brother Goddard was a soldier, just returned home from the war,
And wasn’t really in the mood for fighting any more.
Water flew from buckets; the paddling was intense.
We tried hard to repel the force of those aggressive gents.
Our ineffectual paddling didn’t move us from the fray.
The Oremites came up onside and we became their prey.
A coward leaped upon our raft, took hold of Brother Goddard.
Both victim and assailant fell beneath the murky water.
Emerging from the muddy stream, Nick sucked a gulp of air
And grabbed his hat and sun-glasses and shot the jerk a glare.

As he stared down his attacker (who he didn’t feel like kissing),
His sight was out of focus for one sunglass lens was missing.
From the depths of his frustration, Nick roared a mighty yell
That shook the rocky canyon walls and echoed down the dell.
He’d recognized his favorite hole for catching large mouth bass
And pointed out to everyone just what had come to pass.
We floated ‘round the basshole, tight-lipped and reverently,
Knowing that we didn’t spell it with that silent B.

No further skirmishes ensued against the Oremites.
No unkind words were tossed about. There would be no more fights.
We floated rather peacefully, there were no further clashes.
But if we see those guys again, we’re gonna kick their butts.

- May 13, 2005

Don't forget the sunblock

2008-07-05T07:53:00.000-07:00

From Tulum, looking back toward Cancun. Tulum is a huge archealogical site about an hour south of Playa del Carmen. It was hot, but fascinating.

I'm finally getting around to posting pictures from our trip to Mexico in June. I've forgotten that the first items posted get pushed ahead. In this case, the photos appear in reverse order as they were taken during the trip. This is the Mayaland Hotel, a hacienda built in the 1930's, within the national park of Chichen Itza. We had 1/2 of this nifty little stick/stucco/palm leaves cabin very close to the main building.

Wendell and Emily in front of our cabana.

The great pyramid at Chichen Itza.

Our tour guide, Esteban Mejia from Puebla speaks. Deanna listens intently.
At a pyramid at Ek Balam. The Carvings look fresh and new because this pyramid was covered with vegetation until just recently. A shade of posts and palm branches has been erected over this entrance with its beautiful carvings to protect them from the elements, now that the protective vegetation has been removed.

Esteban, our Mexican certified national tour guide, explaining something fascinating.

Wendell @ Ek Balam, standing at the top of 90 steps on a pyramid that is 1500 years old, overlooking other recently uncovered structures. Our guides told us the current estimate is that there are 63,000 pyramids in Mexico, most of them still covered with vegetation. Any hill seen rising above the canopy is an ancient structure, since the Yucatan is essentially a large, completely flat limestone rock, no mountains, as it rose from the sea about 1500 years ago, raising a land bridge to the rest of Mexico.

It was a long way up... and a long way down.

Along a path to the bathrooms at Ek-Balam.

Our guides.. Esteban Mejia & Jerry Ainsworth. You can see Jerry's work on Book of Mormon sites at http://mormonsites.org/.

New friends Lura & Tracy (grandmother & granddaughter)

The swimming pool at the resort, the Wyndham Viva Mayan.
The amazing buffet at the resort. It was really hard not to gain weight. Well, actually, we did gain weight.

Sunblock is your friend. I forgot to do my front, arms and legs.

Emily enjoyed dancing with staff members at the evening shows at the Wyndham Viva resort. Handsome, young people, often very well-educated, speaking multiple languages, very courteous and kind, who thought of this as a working vacation (15-hour days, cranky tourists).

Random Drug Screening

2008-03-11T11:10:00.000-07:00

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

When I arrived back at the office after a quick trip to Home Depot and McDonald's, clutching a bag containing a filet-o-fish sandwich and a double cheeseburger from the dollar menu, I was met at the door of my office by Heidi Barkdull and Dave Williams. Dave apologetically handed me two pieces of paper and informed me that I had thirty minutes to get to a nearby medical office to submit to a random drug screening test. I had to sign and date a form acknowledging that I had received such notice and would submit to such testing procedures. I signed the form at 12:48 pm. I asked Heidi if she thought I had time to eat my lunch first. She suggested I could eat on the way to the collection site.

I ate the cheeseburger on the way to Concentra Medical Center on Dry Creek Circle. I assumed by the time I checked in, made my requisite deposit and checked out, the filet-o-fish would still be warm and I’d be back at the office by 1:30. I signed in at Concentra at 1:03. After waiting for about 5 minutes, I was handed a clipboard with three forms. I signed the forms and handed over my driver’s license so they could make a copy to verify my identity.

At approximately 1:18, I was summoned to follow Josh Ramirez back to the specimen area. He told me to empty my pockets, put all the items from my pockets into a lock box. Lock the box. Keep the key with me. Wash my hands. Then he handed me a plastic cup with instructions to fill it up to a particular line. If I exceeded the line, I could switch the flow from the specimen cup to the toilet, but I was not to flush the toilet. I opened the door and entered the rather bare room. Holding the cup in one hand, I unzipped with the other, held the specimen cup under the spigot, anxiously awaiting the onset of the evidentiary flow. And waited… and waited. After about three minutes, Josh tapped on the door. “Mr. Tolman, are you okay?” I put the cup down, repositioned the non-compliant spigot and zipped my pants back up. I opened the door, handed the empty cup to the smiling Mr. Ramirez and apologized. “That happens”, he said. He had me sign and date another form to acknowledge that I had been unable to furnish an “adequate specimen”. I duly certified that I had been unable to pee at 1:25 pm. He then informed me that I had three hours to produce an “adequate specimen”. I could not leave the building. He said I could return to the waiting room and drink up to 4 cups of water to promote the production of the desired evidence. After retrieving my personal effects from the lock box and washing my hands again, I returned to the waiting room, picked up a styrofoam cup which would contain 10 ounces of liquid and in a dignified, nonchalant manner, so as not to arouse the curiosity or suspicion of others in the waiting room, slammed down 4 full cups of water. And waited for a tingling feeling from Mr. Bladder to tell me it was time to retest.

While I was waiting for such feeling, a fellow Halliburton employee, Jeff Segor presented himself at the front desk, filled out the requisite paperwork, disappeared with Mr. Ramirez for a few brief moments before sauntering back through the waiting room and out the door to freedom.
I called Deanna, explained my location and predicament. I asked her if she had any suggestions or strategies to help bring my problem to a successful conclusion. Her laughter did not lift my spirits. I picked up a copy of USA Today and browsed through 3 of the 4 sections. At 2:20, I caught Mr. Ramirez’s attention, thinking after almost an hour a quart of water certainliy ought to have gone far enough through the system to generate a few tablespoons of evidence.

He invited me back again. I emptied my pockets, locked them into the lock box, washed my hands, this time with warmer water for a longer time, bending to one of Deanna’s suggestions that the warmer water might promote a better result. Josh handed me a new specimen cup. With renewed enthusiasm, I entered the bathroom, unzipped Mr. Spigot and… waited again. I flicked, shook, rubbed (only slightly) the now-offending body part. Not a stream. Not a trickle. Not a drop. Nothing. After perhaps two minutes total time, Josh tapped at the door. “Wendell? It’s okay.” I put myself back together and sheepishly opened the door with the sad, empty container. I retrieved my personal items again from the lock box, and washed my hands for the fourth time. His instructions were different this time.

“We only have until 4:30. You can drink as much water as you’d like.”

“But I thought you said I could only have 4 cups of water”, I protested.

“That’s because we worry about diluting the urine. In your case, there’s nothing to dilute”, he reasoned. I couldn’t argue with his logic.

I was delighted to find the waiting room had almost emptied out. I went right to the water cooler and started chugging. I lost count after 12 cups of water. When I could drink no more, I started pacing back and forth across the waiting room, hoping that physical movement would hasten the movement of the liquid through my apparently deficient excretory system. The young ladies at the front desk seemed to sympathize with my situation. At 3:00, when I told Mr. Ramirez I thought I might be ready to try it again, they cheered me on.

I placed my wallet, car keys, cell phone and 27 cents in coin carefully into the lock box. I was preoccupied with the task at hand. Josh reminded me to lock the box and take the key. I turned the faucet and waited for the water to reach a comfortable warm temperature before thoroughly washing my hands. I turned, and for the third time, accepted an empty specimen cup from Josh. He nodded, made a small fist and said, “You can do this”.

I opened the door, stepped in and locked the door. This time, I loosened my belt, dropped my trousers, moved the specimen collection device into position and uttered a silent, but very sincere prayer. And waited. After several anxious seconds, feeling led to a drop, then a trickle, but not more. The trickle was enough to reach the minimum line. I was very careful to not spill or drop the long awaited specimen. Josh had me sign a document verifying that the specimen had indeed come out of my body. I initialed the specimen container. The form verified that the specimen was "presented" by the donor at 3:05 pm.

The receptionist, having witnessed my intake in the waiting room offered to provide a list of potential restrooms I might need on the way home. I thanked her for her concern.

I returned to the office. I warmed my filet-o-fish in the microwave at the office. It was palatable.

I don’t think I’ll write anymore. I have to pee.

Fox Hollow Cootie Invitational

2007-11-12T19:13:00.001-08:00

The Fox Hollow Ward held its first (and possibly last) Cootie Invitational tournament on Friday, November 10, a night of high adventure, cheap (diminishing-ward budget-compatible) thrills and light refreshment.
Participants were awarded points for taking the time to RSVP for the event, arriving promptly at or prior to 7:02, winning rounds of cootie couples, mixed cooties and cootie genders. Cries of injustice were sounded during the cootie puzzle event about variances in the degree of difficulty encountered between 24 piece puzzles.

Previously hidden talents were revealed during the cootie mascot and cootie cheer events.

1st place - Mike Nelson

2nd place - Catherine Edwards in sudden death cootie rolloff over...

3rd place - John Jensen

P-word

2007-10-29T15:01:00.000-07:00

It's probably about time to publish this..... names have not been changed...
----------------------------------

The sacrament had been dispensed. The deacons took their seats.
New move-in Kyle Bunker took the podium to speak.
With ease and gentle confidence Kyle showed no signs of stress.
I settled back, half-listening to another youth address.

With wandering mind, I wasn't sure I'd heard what echoed next
When Kyle took a detour from his neatly written text.
He thought himself a Lamanite, a warrior with great will
Until he spied the Nephite soldiers storming down the hill.
The mighty Nephites, armed with swords, and shielded toe-to-head
Filled this unshorn Lamanite with thoughts of fear and dread.
So Kyle had set this brilliant scene. The Lamanites would scatter.
He used a certain phrase to say how he would void his bladder.

I wasn't sure I’d heard him right. I didn’t trust my ears,
But peeking up, my hearing was confirmed by chuckling peers.
Brent Snelgrove’s mouth was tightly clenched. I couldn’t see his teeth,
But judging from his tear-filled eyes a loud laugh lurked beneath.
Mark Pixton’s shoulders quivered as he tried hard not to laugh.
A wave of smirks and chuckles meant that others heard the gaffe.

I couldn’t see the bishop on his lofty front-row perch.
Bet he’d never heard that p-word in such context at the church.
Lowell Bunker is a quiet man. He fidgeted in place.
A look of utter horror flushed his usual tranquil face.
The Bunker children were surprised what sibling Kyle had said.
Older brother Gary thought, “Oh brother, you are dead”.
The word would be prohibited if there were such a list.
I glanced at Sister Bunker and it looked like she was perturbed.

When the meeting ended mother sprinted up the aisle
To have a teaching moment ‘lest that word come into style.
It is a lasting memory, not forgotten by the flock.
‘Twas the day that Kyle Bunker used that p-word in his talk.

Smoky Hill stuff

2007-09-27T16:11:00.000-07:00

Iron Chef - 2006

Summer 2007 - Colorado Cares

Mt. Bierstadt hike

Awful Waffle

Iron Chef 2007

Barbecue - September 26, 2007

The Texas Adventure with Grandchildren

2007-09-20T10:01:00.000-07:00

Several months ago we were informed by our daugher Ali, that her highly motivated husband Adam had won a trip for two to Venice, Greece and points in between and that Ali would be delivering a new granddaughter a few short weeks before the departure for the cruise. We enthusiastically accepted the invitation to watch their children for 10 days or so, while they enjoyed a child-free respite. They departed for the long flight to Europe on Thursday, September 6.

A few highlights - A trip to the pediatrician to try to ascertain the cause of the rash speckling the head and upper abdomen of 5 week old Annie. Hyrum, not many days removed from having needles injected into his bum at the same pediatrician's office, being quite worried about a repeat of the prior experience cried when Dr. Holley entered the examination room. We stopped to feed ducks on the way back home before settling in to await the end of the sisters' school day.

We were exposed to the intricacies of dropping off students before school and picking them up after from school and got to experience Grandparents Day and those appetizing and tasty school lunches.....

During the evenings, the grandparents enjoyed a wide range of cooperative behavior related to homework, meals and bathing...

Grandpa and Grandpa split up one evening - Grandma going to the school for 3rd grade back to school night. Grandpa taking Clara and Emma to a school-sponsored skate night at the local Bruisatorium. Bug Juice was purchased on the way home from skating. Clara seemed to be enjoying skating with a certain boy....

We also made an excursion to Chucky E Cheese for games and pizza.

On the last Saturday, we took a duck tour of Austin and made a quick excursion to the Austin Zoo where we rode the train, got hot and perspired.

The following Sunday morning, Annie was blessed at church in another beautiful Grandma Deanna-knitted christening dress. Annie's parents were still sleepy from the long flight home.

Girls Camp 2007

2007-08-01T12:19:00.000-07:00

On a fateful Thursday evening in the middle of July
The Smoky Hill Young Women met, their spirits soaring high.
With camp approaching rapidly, their lead time running short
They gathered at the chapel as their site of last resort.
They came to hone the camping skills they’d carefully been taught
And practiced fire building in the church’s parking lot.

In recent days the media had done their very best
To tell of conflagrations spreading all throughout the West.
Temperatures were soaring high. Humidity was low.
And bans on outdoor fireworks just added to the woe.
So citizens were wary of incendiary dangers,
Especially of exuberant match-wielding youthful strangers.

Sister Bunker was prepared, as later she explained,
With adequate provisions to keep the flames contained.
With shavings small and steel wool to catch a flinty spark
A tiny flicker of a flame glowed bravely in the dark.
But some well-meaning neighbor, perhaps jealous of the fun,
Reached out and grabbed the telephone and punched in 9-1-1.

The call was dispatched quickly to the firehouse down the way.
The anxious crew responded to the first call of the day.
“Hey, where we goin’, captain?, asked the curious greenhorn bloke,
“The Mormon church is burning”. Exclaimed he, “HOLY SMOKE”.

The girls’ interests were waning and they wondered what came next,
Absorbed in their own messages from cell phones and from text.
The sirens’ wails were closer and fire was mostly out
When suddenly the air was still. The women turned about.
Looking up from texting, they dropped their jaws and froze
As they stared into the nozzle of a 4 inch fire hose.

A fire truck, positioned to attack the hostile flicker,
Was joined by two police cars who’d been just a little quicker.
The fire captain raised his arms and said to be at ease,
He turned to Sister Bunker and advised her, “Next time, please,
It wouldn’t hurt to call us even if the ground is damp
So we can be prepared to help you all be safe at camp”.

Oz & Emily Tolman Reunion - June 30, 2007

2007-07-02T16:52:00.000-07:00

Under a cloudless, sunny (okay, it was hot) sky, descendants of Joseph Osborn Tolman and Emily Veigel invaded Majestic Park in Lava Hot Springs, Idaho for a biennial family reunion. Many thanks go to Lowell Tolman, his wife Irene, daughter Marquette and her husband Jeff Smith for making a meaningful and memorable experience.
Family members from four of the five sons of Grandma and Grandpa Tolman were in attendance:
Janis & Roger Newton represented the Ed & Valene branch of the family tree.

With Lowell responsible for this years reunion, all five of the children of Alvin & Phyllis were able to attend. Clair reduced the volume of his baked beans this year. Much follicle impairment, both intentional and natural is display in this photograph. Beware the glare!

The Dallas and Laura family were well repesented in this photo and the water fight.

Mark, Marie and Risa comprised the Farrell and Marie contingent.

Water guns were available for the small children and older hot people who wished to cool off. Some of the older, slower moving people got to be cooler more frequently than they may have wished...

Ryan and Penny Tolman helped new arrivals register and pick a rubber duck for the first ever Tolman Family Quack Up. First duck down the Portneuf River was to receive a prize. Due to heavy river traffic, the race was cancelled.

Lowell asked the questions. Phyllis gave the answers (with full audience participation) for the following family history quiz. The quiz is provided as a public service for those who weren't able to attend or who may wish to challenge any of the answers. Leave your challenges, questions or suggestions under comments.

Take the Tolman History Quiz:

1. Where was Grandpa Oz born?
2. Where was Grandma Emily born?
3. Where were they married?
4. How old were they?
5. Where did they live during the first two years of married life?
6. What is the name of their foster son?
7. What was the phone number at the Spring Creek Ranch?
8. Who was the hired man?
9. What is the name of the Shetland pony?
10a. How many Tolman first cousins?
10b. How many Veigel cousins?
11. Where did Ed go on his misson?
12. What were Alvin's favorite animals?
13. Which of the sons was a boxer?
14. Who was noted for his tricks & practical jokes?
15. Which aunt is afraid of mice?
16. Who spent the first few months of their marriage living in a tent?
17. Who got bucked off Old Sailor at the July 24th celebration?
18. Who played the clarinet in the school band?
19. Who made more money from the 200 chickens they raised than from milking 20 cows?
20. Who had an unusual horn on his automobile?
21. Who is responsible for the demise of the famous landmark near the Crow Creek ranch?
22. Who was in demand as a good hay stacker?
23. Who played varsity basketball?
24. What was the old red Ford pickup called?
25. Which brother married a girl in her mid-teens and raised her the way he wanted her?
26. Who was showing familyh members how to coast down Old Baldy and ran into a barbed wire fence tearing his Sunday pants?
27. Who is the oldest grandchild?
28. Who is the youngest grandchild?
29. How many direct descendants of this couple?

ANSWERS:

1. Oakley, Idaho
2. Osmond, Wyoming
3. Paris, Idaho
4. Oz 32, Emily 23
5. Sage Valley
6. Jay Gamble
7. 027 R2
8. Ez Jensen
9. Old Bonnie (although during uncooperative times she was called various names)
10a. 121
10b. 4
11. Northwestern States (Oregon and Washington)
12. Purebred Duroc pigs
13. Dallas
14. Farrell
15. Laura and Phyllis
16. Dallas &amp;amp;amp; Laura
17. Ed
18. Alvin
19. Marriner
20. Farrell
21. Lowell & Ron
22. Ed
23. Dallas
24. Death Wagon (this, too, was called by other non-uplifting names at times)
25. Dallas (Laura - 15), Farrell (Marie - 16), Alvin (Phyllis - 16)
26. Marriner
27. Scott (1945)
28. Duane (1971)
29. 191 as of June 30, 2007 (so far as we know....)

Emily on Her Own

2007-06-04T19:09:00.000-07:00

Emily enjoys living away from home so much that her parents were enticed to invest in Utah Valley Real Estate. Located convenient to public transportation, but not quite as convenient to the BYU campus as her previous apartment, the new condo still enables Emily to enjoy the amenities of life in a college town, particularly the long physical distance from her parents in Colorado. Cell phones enable us to talk daily and ask the dreaded question: "Is your room clean?" We have heard that she once confessed to her bishop that she had been somewhat untruthful in answering that question to her mother on at least one occasion.

This is our youngest daughter.

This is our youngest daughter's new condo.

This is the kitchen in our youngest daughter's new condo.

This the living room where the microwaved food is eaten after being prepared in the kitchen of our youngest daughter's new condo.

Memorial Day Swing 2007

2007-05-27T13:45:00.000-07:00

Keeping faith with a commitment to support our children and grandchildren in their accomplishments, we traveled to Austin, TX on Wednesday evening May 23, for the baptism of Clara Benefield. Our luggage arrived on the morning of May 24. We enjoyed a three day stay with pregnant Ali, husband Adam and Clara, Emma and Hyrum. Clara was baptized on Saturday, May 26.

On Sunday, we traveled to Kansas City to spend the remainder of the Memorial Day weekend with son Jonathan, his wife Becky and daughter Samantha and a player to be named (and born) later.

The return leg of the trip was lengthened considerably by the arrival of a hail storm in the Denver airport. Our scheduled 1:45 departure from Kansas City eventually was cleared to take off at 6:30 and the normal 75 minute flight was lengthened by at least 30 minutes to fly south and west around bad weather. We pulled into the garage at 10:05 pm.

These are the three destructive elements known as Hyrum, Emma, and Clara Benefield.

Emma, Clara, and Adam at Clara's baptism. The day would have been a tragic one had Emma not also received a white dress.

Jon and Sam feeding the baby goats in Kansas. Sam might be as excited about her soon-to-be-born baby sister, but her baby sister probably won't display as much excitement as the goats.